It's like a drug

I often tell M that I am addicted to her. It is the truth. I guess I am also addicted to FLR. In large part my last long term relationship broke down after I had tried to introduce it more than once. It never seemed to fit and we always reverted back to vanilla after a short period.

With M, it has been different. Her previous partner often complained that she was way too bossy. So taking charge from the start was natural for her. We had a long distance relationship for quite a while before I emigrated to be with her full time. I now live in her house.

I am dependent on her to navigate all the German bureaucracy that I need to interact with. She does all the "brainy" things now and I do the manual tasks. In my previous relationship, I did all the things that M does for me now. All of this leads to a natural power exchange.

As we have written before, M drafted a contract which I signed on my second day in Germany. She brought me to a secluded place by a lake, and asked me was I serious about signing it. She explained that it was a one way street and that there was no going back. From then on, she would make all the important decisions about my life and would have the last say on everything.

I told her I wanted to sign. So she told me, there and then, to strip completely naked and to sign the contract with no clothes on to signify that any rights I got in future would come from her. There were people about 400 metres away, further along the bank, but I had some tree cover. It was still a very risky and embarrassing situation, but I did it. After making me wait a minute or two to emphasize my new helplessness, she allowed me to dress, and we packed up and went home.

After my hesitation yesterday in complying with M's rule that I dress female at home in the evenings, I made sure to do it without prompting tonight.

Hanna